So, I have to follow him around to make sure hes on the right track. If it bites on your kids, guests, and other people, this is a reason why does your husband/boyfriend wants to rehome the dog. Choosing a pet over a partner is more common than you think. I strongly disagree and when I said this, he got really angry at me. She could scarcely walk to her bed and just played there I know now she was depressed, and had been thru 5 homes, and that maybe she was running away because she was in heat, that was another huge annoying thing I was trying to put diapers on her and such and she wasnt willing to hold still that made me mad or she thought she could run back to her old house. There wasnt one day that I would go to her place without getting drool all over my pants that looked like someone blew their nose on my leg!! If you are confident you can please do ahead and try but if he carries on,please believe me,you are better off without your partner full stop. Think about a puppy who bites you as a result of being a bit exceedingly excited. Thats ridiculous. My cat (had before we met) is and indoor/outdoor cat. Keep in mind that he coaxed her with deer which is her absolute FAVORITE. Not to mention how he cuddles and talks to his dog all evening. I tell him he is making it worse, he reads that same thing and attempts to change his behavior for about a minute. The reason why I want to mention this solution is that lack of exercise could lead to so many troubles, making your husband/boyfriend trying to rehome the dog for the purpose of escape from the problem. He walks the dog, feeds him, plays with him, buys him toys, and so on. they have killed children. Forgive me when I say this but as soon as I finally was able to graba hold of him I immediately ran inside the apartment, and started to hit him on his bum bum and yell at him! These all in his own words after I told him that I wasnt going to do what he had demanded. We cant go anywhere do anything that is not about dog. From the beginning, Mango slept in our bedwhether between us or just near me. Nessa, the dog nipping at my kid would have been the last straw. Just disturbing. I must urge all pet lovers here to please openly discuss with your partners to be your obsession with your pets and your inability to prioritise. (He used to tell me on our early dates (together four years), that were dog oriented, how people looking at us giving glances were checking out his dog (not me). The dogs sleeps in the bed and I cant stand it. Its just nasty and gross! I need to do something. It IS selfish to let the dog continue carrying out said behavior(s) if youre unwilling to take the time to get to the root of the problem. She found her dog and said the shelter never told her how bad he was. i know its what dogs do, but the other one doesnt sit and beg. My partner has changed, shes negative, bitter, angry. This makes me so sad. So I am going to therapy for grief as I am having a tough time handling that. They go berserk at anyone that comes near the house but im not alloud to interveen to shut them up, my daughter calls me a c##t and my wife says im a bastard but not to my face. We have a great time together and have great chemistry. The dog would nip at the husband whenever he tried to get near his wife to show her affection. I would think about if I wanted someone who clearly resents your pet so much in your life. i feel so hurt when this happens that this animal is more respected than i am. yeah? Its constant begging is telling them that the dog can assert dominance and our girlfriends will give in. (He made the comment she would be happier there.) Its their HUMANS that I blame! He moved to a condo and let me stay in the house. So Steve got the puppy, did well to take care of it, for the first month or so. So what am I to do? You have to word it differently than get rid of as these dog worshippers are very sensitive to that. It alters the relationship. This exactly my issue.. love dogs and have had them but I believe in a well training obedient happy dog not one like you mentioned.. and when them not willing to try to fix.. and not understand.. that is challenge.. getting the understanding and I feel quilty because most family and friends dont like the dog..and it isnt here fault it is his creation of her.. she is very sweet and I have lots of very expensive and nice things that are not easily replaceable not big on material things but they are family heirlooms and gifts.. plus I get easily nauseated by smell of dog.. Im trying to not be part of the dislike club.. Something I think my partner can use wisely but chooses not to because he thinks him or the dog should t have to. The dog is his world and Im just a person who lives with him. He would stop talking to me just to pick her up because she always wants him attention specially when he talks, gets close or even awknowledge me. So be prepared for big power struggles when it actually comes time to you wanting something to change. Its hard sometimes to compromise because hes had her before we met, but you have to consider the other persons boundaries. Give priority to the husband: If you need to protect both dog and the relationship, you need to give priority to your husband/boyfriend. I hurt inside feeling the way I do about this dog, and whenever I try to talk to my boyfriend about how I feel he just says its stupid your jealous of a dog, its just dumb. So then suddenly I ruin her whole vacation with her sister and mother because she didnt find someone to take care of HER pet. However, he rarely comes over after work and complains if I ask him to. The owners (in this case it s your boyfriends, girlfriends ) do not know how to train a dog ! and please, dont try to say my dog doesnt smell or have fleas etc. His dog is so naughty and bratty its driving me insane. Hope you make a wise decision & whichever path you choose leads you to happiness. One of the things I miss most, is being able to sleep in on the weekends with my bf. Do a self-evaluation and you may discover that you are stuck in an ever-deepening rut. I asked him why hed never told me this before and why had he let me go for so long under the impression that I would someday have a dog. Me." Their handsome long-haired dog was fed prime cuts of meat, brushed and hugged frequently, and taken. All was discussed prior and she promised all sorts of things regarding there keep, like no begging, toilet training walking etc. With the bed thing, keep in mind that animals will need to be conditioned if you change their habits! keeping me away from him and the puppy. My bfs dog (hes never had pets & bought the dog for his kids when he & his ex wife divorced bc he thought it would make the divorce easier for the kids.I know, terrible idea! When you do your relationship with your dog and SO will be alot more successful. I can totally tolerate a child more than this dog. I feel a relationship should be a balance.. I have tried to have the people in the house only let her in when she quiets but the four other people in the house respond differently giving inconsistent messages. Then try baby gating her after that with lots of good chew toys and music on he radio versus crating. If you have a high-energy canine friend that seeks numerous amount of exercises on a daily basis, with or without intention, it will play rough with your kids. It was in kitchen cabinets, on shelves, in every nook and cranny. Jay, thanks for posting what has occurred since your relationship ended in your life. But, I highly recommend you consult a dog behaviorist prior to meeting a relationship advisor. I have been seeing a man for almost 3 years now. If he shouts at a little dog because he is an insecure man , he will probably do the same to his wife or potential children. Im trying to work things out but he ignores me. This has made someone lukewarm at best about pets someone who absolutely hates animals in the house. It happened too many times. I dont mind dogs but dog is a dog not a baby and i expect them to behave as such that was agreed initially. He raised her like a human child, she is ruined for life. Adopting a dog is expensive, and you live on a budget. I feel angry and hurt because I was not taken into consideration about this decision, a pet is not something you give to someone as a gift, its a personal choice especially someone who is in a serious relationship who has decisions to make with their partner and who isnt staying in their own place and planning to move in a flat. Now he says that I am mean and there is no reason she cant sleep in our bed. I tell him it hurts my feelings when he says things like that about my dog, wishing her dead all the time, but he says what about MY feelings, how I hate the dog, that I do not care that he hates my dog and he feels he has to live with this animal he hates. I dont want dos on the couch but this dog feels no matter how many times you yell and discipline for it he continues to do it. Like you said, everyone ignores the fact that different dogs are bred for different reasons. Its time for you to put your foot down with you bf. According to him, Beau always is doing something wrong. Its really causing a strain on my pregnancy and my marriage. I just wish hed either help or give her to his mom. Ive always had dogs so I know how to train them from puppies & I believe in boundaries with pets. If thats not what you wanted to hear then alternatively, you could just come home with two puppies one day (because he said you couldnt get A DOG) and tell him to deal with it.. The emotional energy invested in loving ones pets robs emotional energy from a human partner Oh please give me strength. Later the same day, I walked in the living room and watched him pick up her muzzle and plant his lips on the side of her face moving his head right to left and left to right, like a hard kiss of passion. I married my husband almost 2 years ago. Youre better off without him and dont deserve that. Im a huge dog lover. My family however took my exs side because to them he put on such a facade he could do no wrong. Absolutely the worst decision I have ever made to try to share my home with this thing that has absolutely NO RULES whatsoever for how it behaves. The last thing you want is a reluctant dog owner to witness a fight. It got jealous and chased away your partner. Our four year old daughter has been bitten four times leaving bleeding wounds each time. He repeatedly says how much he doesnt like him and talks about how its gross when he gets on the furniture. I knew she shed before I moved in but I had hoped to stay on top of it more when actually living here. I thought about how upset he would be to not have his dog Mesa in his life and didnt want to put him in that position. No way. So I caved. Small, low-shedding breed thats easy to train, adopting an older dog to skip the puppy months, paying for it and its needs myself, made sure it was clear the dog wouldnt be allowed on the bed, etc, etc. She never relieved herself in the house. As soon as he is here its bitches drama. I really felt the love from them there. Maybe he is jealous, I dont know. I am in a very stressful relationship where I love both my dog and partner. It doesnt matter how strongly your spouse clings to this decision. Or move out. Now he says Pancho doesnt like being fed in the bedroom, he feels like he has done something wrong. WOW. He was the sweetest dog & loved everyone he came in contact with. Need help with your relationship? Hes nuts. shes 21, attends school and works, and spends most of her days / weeks at her boyfriends house, now, so that cat, in effect, is the sole responsibility of my wife, since her 21 year old son spends his time, 24/7 in his room playing computer games. As I feel she does not care for it properly and number 1, it is not my pet and when I started caring for the dog she completely quit and the dog was becoming my responsibility. They cannot talk. I would like to contribute with my personal story about mistakes that we make when we enter a relationship being a pet lover, but also give a word of compassion to those who find themselves in the same situation that I do. Without going into details, his actions with his beloved pet almost broke me. Contrary to what you may saythe answer is yes, you would. You are human, a different species. Another option is to invest a couple hundred in an amazing dog bed (the kind with a real mattress). Janet, The toys and bed Ive replaced with my own money. Im no longer going through it thank goodness and it was a lesson learned of what to look out for in the dating world. what a pain. I finally had to put her to sleep and say goodbye. Dogs behave the way we TRAIN them to behave. I am an absolute animal person and then I learned the hard way that this dog has MAJOR separation anxiety. Ive tried my hardest to train her, and even my boyfriend (of 4 years ) has made several concessions. My boyfriend stays the night with me sometimes and works overnight and sometimes when he comes home, my dog has jumped on the bed while Im passed out and he gets really annoyed. uh yeah right. His dog doesnt come when he calls her, wants to kill every small dog she sees, barks constantly when left alone in his truck and barks at people walking by my dog has none of these habits but my boyfriend insists his dog is normal wherein mine is not. Thats over the line.but he refuses to act on it . You need to either leave the boyfriend, or give the dog to a family or owner who will care for the dog and not mistreat it. Oh my goodness this is similiar to my story. (2012, January 11). My partners huskies shed like mad, and if he didnt brush them every day there would be a carpet of dog hair everywhere. since I left my partner my dog is so much more relaxed and only now I realise the reason why his own dog was an absolute nervous wreck, he said it was due to her being an ill treated rescue dog but actually now I believe she was warning me of something very dangerous considering what I know now about that man. Get away from these animals as fast as possible. Dump him. I was used to Rocky sleeping with me. Unless hes just being an ass, then maybe you should reconsider staying with your partner. He used to send me cat videos, say how cute to them, stroke them when we met one on the streets and so on. We had to move away and the dogs stayed behind we cant have them right now (thankfully), what I relieve to finally had the bed together as a newly married couple and have quality time together without 2 needy dogs around. I would never ask him to get rid of his animals because that suggestion is beyond cruel. When my oldest was 8, I got her a kitten. I told my mom how I disrespected him over his interactions with his pet. I really like this girl, and I overheard her tell my friends fiancee one night that she can see herself marrying me and hopes I propose to her within two years. Ie. She says that wild be cruel to them. Its always been my choice to let that happen, as I was single at the time of getting him. The dog doesnt know a leash nor rules. I have an African Grey and my sinned deceased husband had 2 blue & gold macaws. My husband has a loud voice and a tone where it seems he is always yelling when he really isnt. He had me promise that I would train a new one as well as I did my last. Im hurt inside as I work long hours and dont see how I will be able to spend time with them over the weekend nor I think this is humane. And Im so sorry for all that youve gone through. Thats dangerous. Husband finds this cute. You get the point. at night the dog climbs on her side of the bed and she even moves up to give her space !!!!! My girlfriend has a dog who Ive been polite with and tend to when Im the only one around. also to those who hate pets what not. I wish I could summon some self-righteous fury but Im not even angry Im just hurt, sad, and bitterly disappointed. She sadly ended up passing and left behind a small dog. I went to bed and my SO comes back to the bedroom to tell me what a POS I am, threatens some bodily injury to myself, says well never have intimate contact again and that shell cut my hands off if I so much as touch her. He says he will be doing it today. He does night shift most of the time n i live with my mother in law. Cant imagine having a baby with anyone else. My wifes stupid dog (125lb German Shepherd) attacked our son and she STILL lets him around our son when I leave the house. I have asked my parents if they wish to foster my baby as i know he will be happy there provided That theyv always treated our dogs like kids. Hello I am in a similar situation and its been very hard. After leaving his other owners, he was just in her house as shes feeding him and petting him. The duvet is covered with hair and dirt. I dont think anyone willingly lets their dog stay in the bed while having sex with their partner I do agree that if the dog is taking up too much space, compromise is in order. Congratulations Misty! Animals cannot show spite but I am not 100 percent about jealousy. If the dog lays on the bed, remove the separation anxiety and start taking the steps to end the problem for the sake of your relationship. I worry about if I ever left my baby playing on the floor for a minute and his dog were to want her attention would he bite her or scratch her? If you managed to do that, good for you and the dog! Any advice is highly appreciated! raise your kids to love and respect animals but making them a sibling, i think not. She was used to having the dog in her bed, in the kitchen, on the couch. I put up with it initially but then I had enough. I just found out mine was paying about 7.50/kg for food thats available through Amazon for 4.75. i would say NAH. I also have a dog of my own. Bobbi doesnt listen at all!!!! I have a partner that was open to my dog in the begging after about 6 months and moving in with her things changed right away, She stopped feeding my dog, walking my dog and tells me how mush she hates him. A lot of peple commenting on here have been outright rude to say people need therapy for loving their dogs too much or treating them like humans. In this process, its almost like these people lose the appreciation (or ability) for having a healthy relationship with a human being later on. Sometimes you cant have it all. I have no bond with this dog maybe because I feel in tired of cleaning every inch of the house before and after work and it still smell stinky from the Min Pin using our house as the bathroom. I too am thankful Ive found this thread because I was truly starting to feel like I am overreacting or finding excuses to argue! But unfortunately I didnt know that and Im now invested in this relationship. I so agree that there are great dogs and great dog owners who get it. Getting 5 hours of sleep because the dogs are up making noise or birds chirping, it gets old real fast. I think its a matter of choice. And I say that as an animal lover, and have had animals my entire life! Is there anyone prepared or happy to take your dog out for giving exercises. Let me remind you, he does not pee in the house and he does not go out any more than normal. She was well trained, stayed home with family when we traveled. I tell him to get her off and he just thought it was no big deal -_- and in the pictures he was sending it felt like I was seeing a couple being all snuggly on two couches and he would tell me she would stare at when he wakes up or falls asleep. Rescue your marriage: find a new, permanent home for the dog and dont buy any more animals without first talking it through. Read my story above. Compromise. If we want to develop a strong relationship with another human, then we must be willing to invest the time and effort that it will take. She did say she was open to having me help train him to break the pattern, but I still feel like shes just gotten too comortable with the convenience of dropping her dog off at her parents house. I had ran inside to go grab a towel. I hear quite a few self-righteous remarks and suggest to contemplate if your worries would really lessen if the dog is no longer I n the picture. i just wanted him to be put out in the living room for tonight so maybe i could sleep..and maybe we could cuddle for five minutes before you sleep..why do u think i hate the dog..honestly if you dont get him training he is going to end up hurting my baby and may end up getting put down is that what you want? I have a spouse who has gradually, over many years, eliminated any actual friends I might have that are not actually his own friends. He has to have some way to release his energy. He wanted a baby so hopefully he will enjoy our baby. I completely broke down in tears. Our cat is still yowling at me because of what the dog did. Twice now she has snapped at him when he has tried to reach in her crate to make her go outside. I say another room because if they are in the same room, theyll keep jumping at the bed until they are brought into itthereby TRAINING YOU to bring them in the bed. ..please i need advice. I hope that some training will be worth trying. Hed spend hours touching the animal while I didnt receive any physical touch. The other part is I dont get how if Im not requesting anything outlandish why he cant see that its a valid request. My dog is naturally well behaves she just begs when we have food but if u ignore her she stops. I just kept telling myself to play the game, be patient and that I knew my goal would take time to achieve. My boyfriend has one, and treats IT like his universe. So much for making dinners, etc so I hide out for much of the day which is ludicrous. I know what it feels like to be second to the dog. They do NOT understand human speech. Email: [emailprotected]. I have family member with dogs, and non of their dogs are behaving in a way that these 2 do. And no, like me, your not losing your mind. By continuing to live there you are becoming part of the problem. I find it devastating to see how many people seem to think they know these dogs but if they did??! In February, we bought our dream house. She would tell me anything about them like videotaping them eating an eggwow big deal. Im in an interesting situation where my dog hates my boyfriend. We all go into relationships expecting our partners to be normal-rational humans that treat dogs like animals and not god-beings. Gah, I cant wait till she dies. Well now my boyfriend is fed up & told me that the cats have only two places in the house. But hes so insistent on making him an outside dog. My boyfriend and I recently moved in together and with that said, I acquired his seven year old Jack Russell female. If I had it my way I would have my dog in the bed every night. I have a dashchund and my husband is so jealous of him.he only shouts at him when poor soul does not even do anyyhing wrong. Woah. Pancho also gets sick about 1X every other month. Im tired of it. I love animals but lets get real here! I believe he got his dog to look posh. You have to be prepared though. Even more frustrating, this 15 year old pitbull acts no older than 4 or 5 years of age. Oh wait.a dog cant do those things so what is the debate then? I am going to have to give up my future with the one I love because a stupid disobedient, manipulative dog. If your husband/boyfriend needs to get rid of the dog by considering the damage to material items in the home, for example, carpet, you can come up with an alternative to the Floor coverings, especially when you are moving to a new house and husband refuse to take the dog to a new house right away. Thanks. Does your husband/boyfriend need to get rid of the dog? A poster above said humans are not naturally monogamous. That is a different matter. Cats are manageable they manage themselves. My husband hates it and has no patience for it. I am an extremely clean person and I like my surroundings to be comfy and inviting. Im at my wits in because I totally resent him which spills over when we have an argument about something else. They did not ask for a dog only compensate because they love you and you have one. Recently, hes started chewing on the carpet in our living room. I am the one who has to primarily take care of her because he works a lot, and she will NOT listen to me at all. What about a puppy bed next to your guys bed? He likes her because she acts sweet to him and he has a lot more patience than I do. Id rather be covered in dirt to be frank. She acted like it was punishment even though they had the WHOLE HOUSE to roam in? Any suggestions? She weighs over 100 pounds and stands about 26 at the shoulder. They would be flattened like a Roadrunner cartoon by these two beasts. At this point, a year and a half later, Im tired of hearing the same complaints day after day. Im I right or wrong ?! He told me to tell him what to do and that he would wear an earplug to protect his ear but he doesnt always want to live up to that promise and starts yelling at the dog again. Lets just say 1 more time that dog is gone!!!! Before getting a dog cosnider the training and the money involved and if you cant your selfish. IMO cooking for your dog is a little over the top and Id be annoyed by it too. I put my foot down and told him I could not deal with the hair in the bedroom or the bed.
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